Venezuela is the second most significant exporter of cocaine in the world after Colombia. It’s home to some of the most spectacular landscapes on earth. The outstanding number of MILFs roaming in  the streets is completely breathtaking. In Caracas, you can find some of the dopest graffiti in all of Latin America. The notoriously unsafe streets keep the tourists away, making this country one the most top-notch destinations on Earth.

Hooligan Holidays! I had 4 weeks to waste my life away. Obviously, I was not gonna waste those 4 weeks in Canada. I had to go holler at my duke Hugo Chavez.

Word life. Once again, your Cuba Facebook pics still don’t impress my intelligence. My state of mind and travel game is way above all you all-inclusive junkies. The only Spanish you  know is “una cerveza, por favor” and “gracias, mi amigo“.  All y’all do is sip piña coladas, lay on the beach and get tanned all day. You people make me sick. On the strength, I’m a heavyweight in this chilling game and I definitely took it very far this time. My chilling performance was very similar to the one on the Costa Rica trip. However, this time it got much more abusive. I dealt with 4 weeks of massive hardbody chilling, constantly generating powerful stunts, applying efficient mook manners while maintaining non-stop drinking sessions from morning ’til night, all day eerrrrrrday! Aight: without further ado, let’s take a look at these darts.

Introducing Caracas, AKA the murder capital of the world. Population: 4.6 million people with 130 killings per 100 000 residents a year. The streets are not safe. When tourists arrive in Venezuela, most of them don’t even stop in Caracas just so they can remain secure. Me, I decided to spend a full week there to roam them dirty streets. I loved it!

At first, I was supposed to buy a bulletproof vest on my way out of the airport, but I wasn’t able to locate a store that had them. Since the crime situations have improved in Colombia and Brazil, the streets of Venezuela have gotten more dangerous every year, because of the high increase of population and poverty. Corruption reigns, there is no gun control, everybody is strapped, people get killed for a pair of fake Nike shoes and get away with it.

Hell, I’m just happy I got away alive from the airport. The Caracas airport is one of the most dangerous airports in the world. Thousands and thousands of kidnappings and armed robberies occur there every year. Most of these robberies and kidnappings are executed by taxi drivers with false licenses. My friend from Caracas told me that he got kidnapped twice in his life and it seemed very normal for him. Apparently it’s not really a rich people only thing, as they kidnap the middle class people as well.

Now you got some clear signs of mookness over here. My heart was filled with pride and I right away fell in love with the beautiful streets of Caracas.

Top notch chilling with a minimum of 12 beers a day! Solera 6%, you already know!

If y’all think the LA River is super dirty, y’all ain’t seen nothing yet. Pollution and dirt, graffiti, broken glasses, needles, crack pipes, homeless people and lots of dead bodies can all be easily found in the Caracas River.

For those that think that under the Sherbrooke/Rachel bridge is the grimiest spot to paint at: you’re dead wrong.

Most tourists that pass through Caracas visit the famous museums, the old cathedrals or even the Jardín Botánico. Me, I felt lots of comfort in these shitholes. It was such an honor for me to be here that I had to crack open a beer and enjoy these gorgeous surroundings.

Los Roques. There should be an MTV Cribs for this castle. The architecture is totally fascinating. I mean, look at it.

Bell ExpressVu has never been this ghetto.

Apparently, this shit is called a Bernard-L’Hermite.

Swimming naked in Venezuela, speaking fly Spanish and eating nothing but fish and seafood.

Back in Caracas, getting my rep up. Big Killa-EF! You already know. What’s hood my mooks? I miss my homies.

No homo. I never understood why there was a rainbow flag on the Caracas metro. Anyways, it was pretty dope to use the metro nonetheless.

Kem Spray. The national hardware cheap paint. The people’s choice!

The graffiti store. It cost me freakin’ 17$ for one can of Montana. Thank god I brought my own caps, cuz apparently one Rusto cap is 3$ .

Getting down in the grimy hoods of El Coche, Southwest Caracas.  I never actually found out if we had permission to paint this wall or not. Shout outs to Nastee, Streak, Zer, Cris, yunk, impe, osk, all the GSC fam for blessing me with this wall. An extra special shout out to everyone who responded to my emails but that I didn’t have time to hook up with, you know? Senk, Apl, Zibek, Riel, Dek, Shock, Repe, Caos, Tros, Kise, Hask, Gil, etc. I’ll get with y’all next time! Much love.

If you look closely, homie is stomping grounds with the Charles Barkley Godzilla’s. Word up son!

A classic Caracas door.

Took the plane down south the country to hit up the Gran Sabana.

You’re looking at the legendary Angel Falls. These are the tallest water falls on planet Earth. The falls drops for 970 meters. That’s nearly one km of wisdom water.

C’mon son. Just ‘cuz I’m in nature, it don’t mean that I don’t have the right to get crunk. I enjoyed a few beers while swimming in the river, staring at the famous Angel Falls. My professional chilling game don’t get more on point than that!

Showers… when I took them. Nuffin’ but wisdom water on my dome.

Introducing Ciudad Bolivar. Definitely the most mooked out city I’ve been to in Venezuela. Broken glass everywhere, drunks all over the place and street hustlers on the daily grind. Everything is allowed.

This would have been a perfect picture for the Forgotten Street Soldiers post. Another cold-blooded street hustler dead on the concrete, straight up hugging the block. Rest In Peace!

The liquor store. Open 24 hours and every day of the week. My duke, this is by far the most fabulous establishment I came across during my whole stay in Venezuela.

Chilling at the most grimy bar in town. Way liver than your average night at Blizzart’s. Anyways. I’m lounging right, getting my sips on, then this hot mami starts rubbing her tits on my back. Great! A very enjoyable Venezuelan massage, that’s all peace. Then, she kept offering me candy. Aight, that’s strange, while I’m sipping beers? She kept on rubbing her gigantic fleps on my back and asking me why I didn’t want the candies. By then, I knew that these candies were probably laced with GHB or something similar. Hell, I always wanted to try GHB but it was not a great opportunity to get loose.

No license plate? No worries, in this country there are no rules.

For those who don’t know, you’re looking at the infamous Colombian Brown.

Nothing better than getting high abroad, checking out the river dolphins popping out of the Orinoco like pop tarts out of a toaster. I’d like to know how often you all-inclusive fiends get high on your vacations.

Drinking many Solera’s on the long bus rides like it ain’t nothing!

Introducing the town of Maripa. Leaving modern civilization and slowly entering Rio Caura in the world-famous Amazon rain forest. What’s hood!

I had the privilege of coming across the Yecuana Indians. Ain’t no Spanish speaking over here, straight up jungle life. No wallets, no school, no jobs, no iPhones or Facebook, no nothing! Survival is based on hunting and agriculture. Most of the indigenous people never left the jungle and have never even been to a city in their lives.

Fish Talk, this must of been the best catfish that had in my life. Fresh from tha river.

Yeah son! It is what it is and you do what you gotta do with what you’ve got when camping in the Amazon rain forest.

Introducing my bed! What’chu know about this? This ain’t no five-star hotel. No tent, no cover, no mosquito net, just a simple blanket as a mattress and, of course, my swagger. It really don’t get more down to Earth than this. Literally. I mean, I’ve slept in some of the worst shitholes in all my travelings throughout all the years, but this was hands down one of my favorite crashing spots, for real.

Shout out to the whole crew!

This was no organized tour at all: straight up transportation. The search for gold and illegal gasoline trade all going down. Nothing but mooks on board, no life vests with the boat driver getting mad drunk all day. Pas beng beng sérieux ces patnais là.

Introducing El Playon, a white sand beach hidden in the middle of the Amazon jungle, 9 hours away by boat from the nearest village. One of the most isolated villages I’ve been to in my life. Only indigenous people live here. Not many Couche-Tards and KFC’s up in the hood.

Dipset Purple City Bird Gang

Drinking beers with a bunch of mooks in a pick up truck. Shit don’t get better than this.

Breakfast of Champions. Squids, arepas, eggs, beans, a juice and of course a nice, cold beer to start the day off fresh.

Playa Grande. You all-included clowns can keep going to Cuba. I got all these beaches to myself.

February 14^th, Valentines Day. I’ve been in Venezuela for almost a month now. It was hot and humid and I haven’t let off since my last day in Montreal. I finally found privacy. I took my dick out of my pants and jerked it like if there was no tomorrow, until I bursted like an active volcano on some Austin Powers shit. If this shit offends you, then you’s a closed minded bitch and you need to step up your Mook Life game, ‘cuz you’re definitely not on my level of mookness.

Alto, No Pase, Peligro. Stop, don’t pass, it’s dangerous. Yea right: watch me rock a classic EF two-letter on this bitch.

Word up! Nothing but raw chilling wherever I stomp grounds. I mean, It is what it is. You leave a mook like me for one month in a country like Venezuela and you can’t expect anything less. Going all out every day, street drinking from morning ’til pass-out hours, getting tanked with nothing but strangers, hollering at all the mooks in sight, walking on beaches bumping classics by Kool G Rap, dropping handstyles, swimming naked, eating fish and pulling stunts like it ain’t nuffin’. Even though you’re supposed to relax on vacations, I came back way more tired than I was before I left. Anyways, those were just a few pics out of thousands. I’m about to bless y’all with more. In the next post, we gon’ explore in depth the beautiful people of Venezuela, so stay tuned!