Having grown up in a house full of women I was fortunate enough to understand certain things at a young age that most dudes won’t pick up on in their lifetimes. One of those things was to appreciate the females for more than just the ass and titties. There is so much more to a beautiful woman than the obvious assets. Some of you mooks might be reading this going “damn, these mooks is soft, get the fuck out of here with that shit…” If you are one of them, than you are just not ready yet or maybe you will  never be. When was the last time we did you wrong?  Don’t get shit confused, we love them ass and tits but we finna put you on to some shit that will ultimately step your wife game up. Personally, when I look at a fine lady, I don’t fix all my attention on the fun bags and backyard. Those are just preliminary steps. Once I’m done doing that, I look at the more finer details. The teeth, the neck, the shape of the lips and most importantly, the hands. The shape in which you keep your hands is a huge indicator to how you are in other realms of your life. If the girl bites her nails, it’s an instant no no in my books. Yeah, you heard me right. I don’t give a shit how hot she is, how big her tits are or how juicy her ass is. If her finger have some down syndrome looking ass chewed up nails, I might as well be hitting pornhub. com that night. Think about it, your hands are the extension of your mind. It is what you feel with and what you use in order to communicate physically. Like if we would apply nails to hair or even teeth, what would that be like? Is it acceptable to have dirty hair with chunks missing out of it on some parts of your head looking like Chucky after he got run over by a 18 wheeler? Is it acceptable to have some nasty chipped teeth with all sorts of rotten food stuck between them looking like Prince Charles after he ate a bucket of corn and spinach? I didn’t think so. So why would you let that slide for nails?

For us dudes it’s simple. The only manicure we ever get is when we are done doing a highway spot with chrome Tremclads. Girls nails have a universe of their own. It’s a billion dollar industry that will never go down. No matter how bad the economy gets, girls are still going to find a ways to get their nails done. Trust me. If you don’t, take it from Izza..

I was sitting in the car free-styling intensely to myself while my homie ran in to Lauzau to grab some camera equipment. Next thing you know I got a “fan” laughing outside the car. Swagfail… I looked closer and it was Izza. I had not seen her for a minute so we shared a cigarette and she had told me she works right across the street  doing nails. I was stoked. I asked to see her hands she she had these gorgeous nails that you see in the picture. I flicked them, we had a short conversation and it ended on that.

Here we are months later and shes about to break down some of this nail science to you mooks. Who would of known?

Mook-Life: Tell us a little about how you got in to this nail game?

Izza: Like everything in life that’s meant to be, it just happened!

Mook-Life: Shit, I can definitely tell you are living the Mook-Life just by looking at this table. Is this How you start your Friday night?

Izza: Yea yea, you know, my girl and me were just fuckin around with nails, more peeps came through and we ended up getting crazy…

Mook-Life: Damn, look at those nails! She better fix them shits up or a mook like me aint finna talk to her. Working at the salon you must see some mooked out nails being done. Any good stories or particular clients with extremely busted hands come in to mind?

Izza: Well there’s a lot of stories… but none I remember…Actually there was this one that time that this woman had 7 fingers. Two of them where just dangling and I had to do them anyway. I should have charged her extra.

Mook-Life: When your finger nails look like your toe nails, getting fakes ones is the only option. Do you prefer working on fake nails or the real deal?

Izza: I like to work on fake nails (extensions). But they look so reeeeeeal deeal when done that you wouldn’t even notice they fake!

Mook-Life: I can see that her nails are starting to look a lot better already. Is that a residue vacuum she has her hands on? Also, sometimes I pass by some of these chink nail salons and the toxic fumes that come out of those places are so intense I would be scared to get my hands around any of those products. Do people ever get sick in your profession?

Izza: Word, well this lady was super nice, and I love challenges like these ones. The thing she has her hands on is a UV lamp to cook the gel. It smells like candy up in here! If you come too close to my purse you might smell something else! We don’t use acrylic so, no smell!

Mook-Life: Working with grimy hands is one thing but fucking with people’s fucked up feet is another story, yuk. How do you feel about it?

Izza: Well those are MY feet so they are fucking amazing! But when it does come down to the nitty gritty, it gets professional and I do this out of passion, and passion of helping others feel better about themselves! I know people are very satisfied when I do their feet, so I just gear up on disinfectants and gloves and 35 minutes later its done and I usually see them a month later since they are so happy! It takes3 or 4 pedicures to get feet in good condition!

Mook-Life: This woman walked in with hands looking like they went though a freak accident involving a hammer and a lawn mower. Now, shes walking out with beautiful, lavish nails looking like a million bucks. I guess this is where it pays off. Speaking of paying, how much did this treatment run her?

Izza: I took this as a challenge and I’m really happy with how it came out, and it was super dope to see how happy she was! It cost her about 55$ plus taxes and lasts her about 3 weeks to a month!

Mook-Life: What was the inspiration for this set of nails?

Izza: Wanted to bring my passion for smoking into my profession! I’d seen some Jamaican themed nails when I started last year, and I finally banged some out! Looking real proper like!

Mook-Life: I love how you customize your nails to match your gear. This is 100% mook life approved. Do mooks ever notice this when you go out or do most men just look at your ass and titties the whole time?

Izza: Well aside from the obvious, fresh nails just adds to the whole element of the swag culture, you got the fresh jeans, shoes, hair and jacket AND on top of it all the nails is did..pff we ain’t lookin for no mooks!

Mook-Life: Do you have anything to say to the mooks out there who over look this sacred art?

Izza: It is what it is! I love doing this shit and there’s a lot more behind super fresh themes to it. Just like the aspect of doing anything to a letter, this way you can do anything to a nail! If you ‘overlook it’, you actually hating on the freshness!.

Mook-Life: Word up and thank you for breaking this down for us. Hopefully more dudes will respect the gangster next time their girl gets her nails done. If  you are looking for a good spot make sure to hit up Candy Nail Bar (514) 276-7835 or visit www.candynailbar.com

Mook-Life also connected with a few amateur nail enthusiasts to display their nail game and show us how they get down. You don’t have to go to the salon to get them shits done. Lots of girls out there are just as crafty from the comfort of their living room.  Lets see what these fine girls had to say.

Mook-Life: Introduce yourslef.

Thes:I’m Shani, also known as Thessy Thes, the girl who falls in the lake while taking a piss. How mooked out is that?

Mook-Life: Thats heavy levels of mooked out! Almost as mooked out as the time I shot my boy by accident playing with a pistol thinking it was BB gun. But that’s a whole other story. Do you remember the first time you did your nails? How old were you and how did it feel after you had them done?

Thes:I don’t really remember the first time I did my nails but I would say that it was not too long ago. Since I’m a tomboy who likes girly stuff, becoming feminine was a loooong route for me. I now rarely leave my nails unpainted because nail polish adds that little something that completes an outfit or style.

Mook-Life: I’m glad you made the transition! Too many pretty girls out there be on some tomboy shit looking like some dirty teenage skater. The Cheech Wizard joints are ill as fuck! What inspired you to make them in that theme?

Thes: I think it is a classic pattern/character, I usually like plain or simple nail designs but I wanted to do something funkier than a mosquito tweeter and here I am! I check nail blogs pretty often but I never came across something like this. It was my duty to do it.

Mook-Life:I’m glad you did. Those nails be banging. Us dudes, we get competitive. I see some mook on the street with a ill fitted I finna sucker punch him from the side and run off with my new head gear. Do you ever look at other girl’s nails? If yes, is it on some competition shit or is it on the appreciation tip?

Thes: I definately look at other girls nails but not on some competition shit. I never felt competitive against other girls so it’s simply a pleasure to see someone else who does or likes the same stuff as you.

Mook-Life: Any last words to the ladies out there or to the mooks who overlook a nice set of nails?

Thes: girls, guys DO look at your nails. It is part of the whole that you represent so look fresh, feel fresh.

Mook-Life: Word! Thank you for taking your time to participate and for your wise words of wisdom. Hopefully some of these girls will follow the footsteps. Make sure to check out Thes‘ blog for all sorts of dope flicks.

Mook-Life: Introduce yourslef.

Throne: Miss Throne *MY

Mook-Life: Do you remember the first time you did your nails? How old were you and how did it feel after you had them done?

Throne: The first time I did my nails I must have been around 4 or 5, wouldn’t know how I felt after but my mom tells me I used her Chanel nail polish and applied it to our furniture.

Mook-Life: Word up! I can see you were a mook from a very young age! The Black and yellow joints are ill as fuck! What inspired you to make them in that theme? Was it the latest Wiz Khalifa jump off?

Throne: “yellow stripe, black paint. dem ni**as scared of it but dem hoes ain’t!” Of course it was inspired by Wiz Khalifa. That track has been stuck in my head all week.

Mook-Life: Us dudes, we get competitive. I see some mook on the street with ill shoes I finna ask his size and if it corresponds… make him run those shits! Do you ever look at other girl’s nails? If yes, is it on some competition shit or is it on the appreciation tip?

Throne: I do. It’s always on the appreciation tip. I never been the jelly type.

Mook-Life: Any last words to the ladies out there or to the mooks who overlook a nice set of nails?

Throne: Mooks… ain’t nothin that’s up but us.

Mook-Life: Good looking out! Thank you for giving us this special treat. Imma catch you on the them streets. I know you be doing that All City Chillin.

Our last nail head is a fine young woman who’s majoring in Women’s Studies. For those mooks who are confused and don’t know what “Women’s Studies” is… It’s pretty much a bunch of dykes sitting around bitching about patriarchy. They do have good knowledge about certain things, though. Lets see what she had to say when Mook-Life asked her, why  do you think that girls get their nails done?

Cousin Ric: If a girl tells you that she endures 2 hours of getting her cuticles sandblasted, her nail beds raped and a group of North Asian women talking shit about her in a language that she can’t understand because it serves as some sort of quality vaginal “me time” or whatever, she’s lying. Getting your nails done professionally fucking hurts, is inconvenient as hell and it turns your real nails into wafer thin little troll claws but the end result is well worth it. A well manicured hand is indicative of a lot- it’s kind of like a white collar/ blue collar thing. If you’re a bitch who slings garbage bags for a living, chances are that you’re not rocking UV gel French tips. At the same time, you can be as done up and proper as you’d like but if your nails look like gnawed down little woodchips and you let your skin get all bloodshot and swollen around them, you’re pretty much telling the world that you enjoy snacking on keratin and bacteria and that you’re essentially revolting. I don’t know. I think that whether they’re real, fake, pro or DIY done, having properly filed and polished nails just shows that you give a slight shit about looking right and generally adds some flare to your handjobs.

I will finish this with an anecdote. I remember a few years ago I was chilling with my homegirl. She was looking sexy but she kept chewing on her nails. I asked her if I could see her hand. I looked at it and was imminently disgusted. This is what I told her: “I would never let hands like those anywhere around my penis!” Years passed and we did little to no chilling in between. Last summer we went to Parc Des Cascades in Rawdon. She was rocking a nice bikini looking sexy as usual. I noticed that she had really pretty nails and I complimented her. This is what she replied: “It’s thanks to you, asshole! That time you told me that you would not let hands like that around your dick really affected me and I stopped chewing on my nails.” She might not realize but that was a huge deal for me. If my asshole mookish remarks helped a girl get nicer nails than my life on this planet had a purpose.

Big shout out to all the girls who came though with the flicks and knowledge. Much respect to all the females out there keeping them nails looking clean. Next time you see a bitch with busted nails, call her out. Maybe she will do the world a favor and start taking care of them.