I’m never really impressed when I’m checking out your facebook pics of your recent trips to Cuba. You god damn tourists don’t know shit about traveling. You average Joes always end up in the same old all included hotels in Cancun or in the Dominican Republic…I guess Costa Rica too, however, my approach is different.

My approach to Costa Rica was based on my refusal on going to an all inclusive hotel. When i’m getting nice and i’m on my vacation, the last thing I wanna encounter is a bunch god damn white kids from Trois-Rivières, or some drunken German douche bags or a sloppy couple from Chicago that just got married.

Don’t get me wrong, I got nothing against all included vacations trips, they are great for mooks who love to abuse privileges and free goods and all that good shit but on the strength, fuck that! Killa-Ef don’t get down like that. I do the same shit that yall do but I do it outside the hotels! Drinkin’ in broad daylight always been my thing and I do it in the local streets with the loco peeps, ayo check it, this next post is dedicated to all the mooks out there getting their travel on, constantly pushing the limits with their mookish ways and habits from back home. This is how i did it in Costa Rica.

Aight so here i am, stomping the holly grounds of the grimmy streets of the capital San Jose. Metropolitan Population of 1,715,485. It was not too long before i got to leave my stamp of approval.

It didn’t take too long for me to cop some beers, Costa Rica’s famous Imperials! Those who been, they know! Obviously, its 2 at the time, ain’t no half stepping or time wasted in my professional chilling game.

I must say, the Bum game was pretty impressive and quite up to date in San Jose.

I spent a good hour checking that competiton, not cuz i’m into biking and shit, mostly just because i’dd see these guys break their faces over and over and that shit was hilarious.

Smashhhhhhhhhh the young flesh.

Oupsy Daisy!

It’s a really small world, I mean, I was chilling in this park right, and I randomly bumped into my man LastOne. Ya figgadeal me thunn thunn.

GSM worldwide son!

Nothing makes me more proud than this, young Costa Ricans rocking them straight letter fonts, it definitely gets the Killa-EF approval.

It didn’t take too long until I fell in love with Costa Rica. My heart was filled with pride when I spent my afternoon chilling in this gorgeous park where I found much comfort. Filthy and grimmy places where most people call it hell, I call it home.

Fama FX

I fucks with Soja THC and Negus, all city kings!

Bang!!! Wu Tang up in Costa Rica! This is 100% Mook Life approuved, especially when its over someone else’s throw up.

Puerto Jimenez, South West Coast!

Those freaking parrots aren’t as nice as they look. These fuckers make so much noise, 10 times more aggravating than a god damn crow. Let’s just say that these birds were my alarm clock during my stay in Puerto Jimenez.

Wu Tang Killa Beee grass hopper! Damn dukes got their Wu Wear game on lock!

Poisonous! Ain’t no creepy crawler shit.

Do you drink by yourself? By then my Sauza bottle was almost empty, getting drunk all by yourself and being in the most isolated places in the country is one of the best experiences one can have.

Wooooosh!!! Fish Talk. Getting my sea food on!

Those are my hommies; Juan-Carlos, and the other guy, i think he’s name was also Juan-Carlos.

In poor countries, this is how they smoke. This is the most genius homemade bong I’ve ever seen in my life.

Even in the middle of the jungle they have rehab spots. This was built on advance before my arrival.

Whoa!!! Check out those colors duke. Flames B!

So this is why I rather adventure myself in the wild instead of relaxing in an all inclusive hotel. And don’t worry about my personal consumption, I always arrive fully equipped with pre-rolled spliffs and a backpack loaded with local beers.

Cranky Mate!!! Crocodiles have been around since the age of dinosaurs and they are far away from being instinct. Look at those eyes, they look exactly like the one’s of a Velocyraptor in Jurassic Park.

As long as your outside of the water you should be safe. Nevertheless Crocodiles can still move fast even if they are outside of the water, if you do get chased by a croc then you just gotta get your Steve Irwin on and run in zig zags and they will eventually stop running after you.

Canopy Tours!! Costa Rican roller coasters.

Yup! My tent and all my shit. It is what it is. Solo camping in the middle of the jungle, what chyall know about that! I’m a trained professional, therefore you best believe that I refused to hire a guide to cross the jungle. Fuck it, I does it all by myself!

The Baird’s Tapir, an Elvis Presley look-alike mammal from Central America. Elvis Presley is much bigger than he looks in the picture. He’s the size of a donkey and when he feels threatened he can charge up and stomp you 6 feet deep in the ground. When i spotted Elvis, i went up to him and sparked a huge pre-rolled spliff. My duke, I must be the first tourist on planet earth to ever smoke a spliff in front of a Baird’s Tapir.

Ok…here’s the story you all been waiting for. Understand, Corcovado is a large national park on the west side of Costa Rica that lounges on the Pacific Ocean. So long story short, I’m in the jungle right, I randomly ran into a couple from Belgium so I decided to hike with them for the rest of the day, they were kind enough to take this picture of me. 

Now, we gotta to reach the ranger station before dark or else were fucked. I spent all day taking pictures and smoking spliffs and I was a bit late on my schedule. By then it was about 4pm and it was already the high tide, that’s bad news! The water was too high to cross on the ocean side, the waves were way too strong and they would have sucked me in the Pacific where I would of drowned…I`m like shit, whatever, sure it’s all gravy, I’ll just go down the river further down the jungle where there is no strong current flow and I can safely cross the river from there. I was dead wrong. As you can see, I got my bag on my head, all my equipment, my passport, wallet, dinero, cameras, tequila, food, pre-rolled spliffs, etc… I can’t allow myself to slip and fall, so I’m going extremely slow…

Now, as soon as I was reaching the shore, I turn back and see this huge Crocodile coming at me!!! I was at a perfect distance to get out of the river. If I stayed another 15 seconds in the water I would of been dead meat! True Story!!!

On my way back to San Jose, I was able to identify some gangsta graff from OG writer STEEL Msk from tha Bay Area.

Reyes Msk on Avenida 1, extremely bate spot.

Baby Mamas! Wow what a Money Shot!!! Look at those legs dude. Some excellent people watching going on over here, they watch me creepin.

It’s raining skittles maing! I kid you not I saw thousands of those tomatoes and potatoes falling down from this loaded truck. It won’t be too long before the mooks pick em up. Motherfuckers ain’t wasting shit.

Nothing excites me more than this. Garbage, dirt, filth, rusty nails, broken beer bottles, used needles and all that good shit. Always a pleasure to wander on these beautiful sights. Way flyer than your average trip to Cuba, cmon son, what chyou know! This is how Killa-EF gets down.

Stay tuned for tomorrow’s post, our boy Society’s Disease just got back from Costa Rica last week and he gon break down the sequel of this week’s Costa Rica special Hooligans on Holidays!